Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Odd Creatures with Habits


If you read the introductory lines of my blog, you will see that I attract unusual people to me.   I’m a magnet.  
My mother would like to say that it’s because I’m sweet and unassuming.  
Boy, did I pull the wool over her eyes.

I am easy going and weirdoes gravitate toward me, except for my friends.  
Okay, some of them may be a little skewed, but I like skewed.

This fact also applies to animals: the starving stray cat that pushed her way into my life, followed by unwanted kittens, and then there are my two Weimaraners. 
All of them are weird and in my household, they fit right in.  

Kaiser is on the left, Duke on the right
Let me tell you about the dogs.

Kaiser is neurotic; he suckles his blanket when he’s stressed out. 
He stresses over the cats in the bedroom and every decibel of noise in the neighborhood. 
He even hears the leaves falling off the trees and barks.  
Sadly, his bark isn’t one of those teacup poodle barks.    It's deafening.

However, the worst disorder Kaiser has is separation anxiety. 
I thought separation anxiety was only found in humans, but he has it really bad.  

Kaiser doesn’t like to be away from his brother Duke or his humans.  
When Duke has to go to the vet’s office, Kaiser must go with him.  
The assistants put a paper collar around his neck with “Here for Moral Support.” 
In reality, that should be written on Duke’s collar.

On those rare occasions that Kaiser is away from Duke, Duke is relieved to be alone.

When we leave Kaiser, he finds a way to be destructive. 
The trashcan is turned over, despite the 2-gallon water jugs on top and being turned backward.  
Every particle of trash is shredded and pulled around the house.  
I’d like to identify Duke as the angelic one, he does his fair share of garbage digging.

Duke is the mellowest dog I’ve ever seen, but what’s freaky is that he can outstare me. 

He doesn’t blink like a normal dog.  
I can keep my eyes open for a minute at a time, but he stares for much longer.
I tried to time his stare once: he didn’t blink for 43 minutes. 
Actually, I’m not sure because I lost interest in watching him and started doing other things.  
When I came back, his eyes were still wide open.

It’s scary.   
Can you trust a dog that looks at you without blinking?   
I think he should apply for the Guinness Book of World Records.  
I wonder if there’s any money in it?

           Thankfully, Duke and Kaiser sleep with their eyes closed.  
           But the snoring is horrific...


            I'd love to hear about your pet oddities. I'd love to hear fro you. Please email me at aitken.helen@gmail.com.


           Have a great day, without weird animals.







us…

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