I don’t obsess on many things but I am overly curious. Since the Super Bowl this year, I’ve been thinking about chicken wings, a lot.
I have questions. For instance, when you order “wings,” why does the plate also come with baby legs? And why are the little legs called “drumettes”?
Can you drum with them, and wouldn’t that look stupid?
I’ve also been thinking about the kinds of chickens I buy and the sizes of their parts.
I went to Lowe’s Foods yesterday to get some rotisserie chicken at the deli counter, and asked for white meat. I got a ¼ chicken piece with the breast and the wing, where the wing was ½ the size of the breast. It was large enough to, well, fly.
Then I looked at what would be the dark meat portion. The thigh and leg parts were huge. I could almost envision the chicken running for his life on that leg.
I suppose if you put all these parts together, you’d come up with a hefty bird.
Then I walked around the corner to the party foods and there they were, barbecue wings on a platter. Interesting. These parts were miniatures compared to the other chicken I saw.
Where did they come from? There were so many midget parts that they had to be another kind of chicken, midget chickens.
But, what happened to the rest of the chicken? Were the chickens so tiny that the good parts were only fit for “wings”? I’m sure they couldn’t fly or run very well.
Then again, maybe midget chickens are related to “boneless” chickens.
It’s hard to imagine a genetic deformity that farmers want in their chicken coops, but they have to be easier to round up.
For me, this whole subject falls into the category of “mystery meat.” You know, the stuff you got from the school cafeteria, which was chopped, pressed and came in a gray color.
Mystery meat covers a lot of territory. Maybe this mystery meat is something I shouldn’t be so curious about. Perhaps I should become a vegetarian.
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